So it takes him a while

[goawayleavemealone]

It takes him a while to pick up the bloody phone and call, because...

Well, things are busy. It's not an actual walk in the park to run a government intelligence agency, and he has a lot on his plate with that, to say nothing of his crazy ol' dad, who's been sick and a sister who hasn't been around much recently.

But he shoulda called sooner.

it's not that he doesn't care. He cares, it's just...

It's Pryde.

It's Pryde and she was gonna marry the bloody Russian.

Still.

Shoulda called sooner.

So he taps her icon in his contacts, sits back in the chair at his office, and he waits.

Comments

[enduring_pryde]

"I'm excited to see them again. It's been over a decade since I saw Alistaire. I used to have a crush on him too." She laughs and starts packing some of her sensitive to software and other equipment. "I'll be doubly sure to wear my Cubbies gear and play up to that stereotype." She tilts her head. "You know, we could get a lift back via the Blackbird."

[goawayleavemealone]

Pete wrinkles his nose a little at the knowledge that Pryde had had a crush on Al, but doesn't comment.

"Probably beat the hell out of taking a commercial flight back, he says as he watches her.

[enduring_pryde]

She starts to cackle. "The man was seriously hot, okay? But he had eyes for Rachel."

She smiles. "It's a two hour flight."

[goawayleavemealone]

"Well then not only did you have very odd taste in men, but he was bloody blind if he noticed someone else before you," Pete says without thinking. He shuts his mouth after that, feeling a little foolish.

"Like I said, beats the hell out of commercial."

[enduring_pryde]

She smirks at his foolish expression and gingerly kisses him. His fanwaving and look was just too inviting.

[goawayleavemealone]

He lets it happen, but only briefly, kissing her back but moving away, gazing down at her, unwilling to let himself get caught up in this moment; not ready to jump into this, least of all in the doorway of her room in the bloody X-Mansion, where anybody from Wagner to Wolverine could wander by and skewer him.

Not that he was the one initiating all this, but he knows what people thought back when they were together, and that probably hasn't changed much. Older man. Younger woman.

"Like I said before. You are bloody dangerous."

[enduring_pryde]

The reaction she gets is what she expected. Essentially Pete was in enemy territory and he was going to be on his best behaviour.

It was amazing to her after all of this time, all that they have gone through, her ability to read him was keen as ever.

It makes her have a startling realisation. She offers him her hand. "Pete, I need to tell you something," she says, sobering. "Will you please come in?"

[goawayleavemealone]

He swallows and steps further into the room, but not by much, a string of curse words run through his mind as he watches her expression grow serious.

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck what now fuck fuck fuck fuck fu-

"Look, Pryde..." he says awkwardly. "If you're havin second thoughts about coming to London, that's fine. Nobody said you couldn't change your mind. Spur of the moment thing after all."

[enduring_pryde]

"Peter," she says, giving him a look, and while still holding his hand, with her other hand she closes the door. They need privacy.

"You have every right to be gunshy and down right scared of me and what you do by my influence. I understand. I make you take actions that are out of your comfort zone. And like me, you are seizing on a sudden opportunity because it is the most right feeling thing to come along in a very long time and you don't want to fuck anything up. No, I get it. I'm there too." Which wasn't what she was intending to say, but needed saying.

She sighs, her gaze softening. "I need to make something abundantly clear. When we were dating before, I didn't consciously realise my influence. I was reckless with your heart and I deeply apologise for that behaviour. I was scared there would come a day where you would stop loving me. I should also also make clear that I never felt anything romantic for Rigby, that SHIELD tech. His appearance simply made me question my choices. I had barely just turned twenty. I had never had a serious, adult relationship prior to you. And the sudden thought of being in a long term relationship that could result in marriage frightened me. I had experienced a lot of life--travelling, seen friends and loved ones die, other acts of violence and human atrocities--but on a social level, I lacked any emotional maturity to be in that sort of relationship with you." She smiles softly. "It's been thirteen years since then, and I know what my very recent track record looks like--being engaged to two different men in the period of six months--I am not going to endanger your heart again. I cannot put you through that again. And should we get married and should we divorce, I will insure to keep things as amicable as possible." Her smile brightens. "And you feel just right. I have no clear explanation for it. I feel like my life would be expansive and fulfilling with you."

[goawayleavemealone]

"Right. Okay." He rubs his eyes. "Okay, hold on. Just-"

Pete blows out a breath. "Pryde. You know how I feel about you. Have felt, for a really long time. I didn't leave because of Rigby, or how you may or may not have felt about him, that had very, very little to do with why we broke up." He gazes at her, leaning back against the closed door. "I left, because it had become abundantly clear that we weren't making each other happy anymore, and as much as I loved you...you're right. You were really young; too young to be getting involved with someone who had been through all of what you were goin' through already."

He takes a breath. "As for us...for this? It's been thirteen years since we were together. As much as we both like to think we still know each other? The truth is it's not that simple. We're both different people, and before we start talking about marriage, or...divorce, which...Christ, Kitty. You just broke off two engagements in the span of six months. Do you even know what you want? Because I'm really not sure you do. However 'right' things might always feel with you an' me...you need to take a breath and think about what it is you're looking for."

[enduring_pryde]

"And now being thirty-three, I would like to think that I'm not too young for much of anything anymore. I've been a grad student and a teacher. I've led men and women into combat. My abilities to observe and reflect have gotten better."

And yet, two engagements in six months. "Quill gave me some needed fun again but let's face it, the man has the emotional maturity level of a turnip. And fun doesn't last forever on its own. Plus hes always running from something and being the source of his own problems--and in space, so they are galactic problems. I had good reason for the break up--but getting myself into that position on the first place is a different matter."

She runs a hand over her head and takes the beanie off. She shakes her hair out, but given how she hadn't brushed it to begin with, it sticks out of place once the beanie is off.

She smiles softly. "I want someone whom I can create a life with. Someone who can call me on my bullshit. Someone to have children with. Someone who isn't trying to turn me into someone that I'm not. Someone who can make me laugh and hold me when I cry."

Kitty shrugs. "I needed this to be said before I go to England with you. I don't have any expectations about this. I'll stay as long as I'm wanted there. If you and I rekindle our relationship, wonderful, if not that's fine as well."

[goawayleavemealone]

It would be so easy to fall back into things with Kitty. To just let that smile reassure him that everything will be okay.

"Let's just...we'll see how it goes, yeah?" he says softly.

[enduring_pryde]

"All right," she says and gently gives him a hug. "Thank you for dropping everything and coming out here to talk with me in person--and for whisking me away." She was tickled by that.

[goawayleavemealone]

He kisses her temple, as he gives her a one-armed hug in return, rubbing her side gently.

"You're lucky I'm such a sap," he teases.

And that I'm still in love with you, he doesn't say.

[enduring_pryde]

"I am and you are." She smiles and then returns to her packing.