Day 2

[goawayleavemealone]

He wakes with a start, his eyes darting around the room quickly, and then falling on Kitty, still asleep with her head on his chest.

He blinks, looks around again, and frowns as the events of the day before come back to him.

What had began a simple phone call to check up on an old flame had turned into him inviting her to run away to London, and her confessing that she thinks they belong together.

Which is terrifying, brilliant, and probably short-lived.

She'd promised the night before that she wouldn't hurt him again, and he wants to believe that, but he knows that jumping into this so soon after she was supposed to marry Piotr Rasputin is playing with a very specific kind of fire.

It's hard to ignore how good it feels to have her so close though. He lays back, staring at the ceiling, thinking about the last time they were like this. it was so long ago, before things had gone south. By that point, they'd been sleeping on opposite sides of the bed, barely touching.

But before all that...when things were good?

Things were really good.

It's painful to admit how much he's thought about being able to do this with her again; how pathetic it makes him that he kept missing this.

He closes his eyes and tries not to think about it.

Comments

[enduring_pryde]

She has been awake before Pete suddenly shifts, but she doesn't say anything. Her head is spinning, left reeling from a dream that felt all too real.

Kitty had experienced many dreams like that throughout the years. And while it felt real, she very much knew it was a dream.

It made for a pleasant version of the future. A continuation of the previous day, but twenty years in the future. Married, happy, with a child who had just moved out of the house. They had a house in the city, with lots of natural light and gardens. She felt deliriously happy and light-headed. There was so much love in her heart--more than she thought was actually possible, really.

Waking up to her present situation suddenly made her life feel dull and lacklustre. Even with the years they had lost, there was so much they could gain from rekindling their relationship. And this time it would work.

Her eyes are still closed when she speaks. "I want to marry you, Pete. I don't care when. I mean, when you're ready--but I want to." She takes a breath. This needed clarification. "I know how this looks, but I'm certain it's what I want. Like at the level of going to Xavier's and becoming a member of the X-Men level of certainty here. That may not sit well with you just yet, but I just wanted to put it out there."

[goawayleavemealone]

He doesn't look down at her yet.

"We're not talkin' bout marriage 'afore coffee."

[enduring_pryde]

"That sounds like a wise idea," she agrees and settles back in.

[goawayleavemealone]

He takes a breath and gazes down at her. "Why are you in such a hurry?"

[enduring_pryde]

"Why aren't you? We've each chosen a career path that pits us in the face of danger at all times of the day. Tomorrow isn't a guarantee for either one of us."

[goawayleavemealone]

"Kitty, marriage isn't any kind of guarantee for anything," he points out. "Your parents were divorced before your dad died. So were mine before my mum was killed. It's a ring and a piece of paper, and more often than not, both get tossed in the bin."

[enduring_pryde]

"And I think it means something more. I respect the vows. I haven't made it through them because neither Piotr nor Quill were the right person. I don't trust either one of them to keep any promises." She bites on her lower lip. "I realised the main reason I kept going back to Piotr was because I thought I could save him from himself and his dangerous tendencies. But my self-preservation won out, with some prompting from Yana. I don't want to marry you because I want to fix you or hold you in check. I want to marry you because you make my life better and we can have a future together where we have a life that is ours. You can give me everything I've ever wanted and that used to scare me. It doesn't anymore. I respect it. I value it. I'm not going to toss anything into a bin."

[goawayleavemealone]

"And you do know that all these things that you want, you can have without the marriage license, yeah?" Pete asks. "We don't have to get married to be together. We don't have to get married to stay together."

He can't say he hasn't thought about it, but it's...

The first time they'd dated, his mental state had been the equivalent of a sack of screaming, wet cats.

Pete Wisdom still probably isn't marriage material these years later, and he knows it.

[enduring_pryde]

"I also want your name," she says matter-of-factly. "And I do like ceremonies."

[goawayleavemealone]

He stares at her, completely and utterly puzzled.

"What's wrong with your last name?"

[enduring_pryde]

"Nothing. But marriage would make my name Katherine Anne Pryde Wisdom."

[goawayleavemealone]

He stares at her for a long moment, before starting to laugh. It's soft at first, and then gets a little louder and he rubs his eyes, unable to stop.

[enduring_pryde]

She watches him for a full minute before she says "You can go ahead and stop now. Really?" She rolls her eyes. "How is that even funny?"

[goawayleavemealone]

"S'just-" He sighs heavily and gets a hold of himself.

"It's the least complicated reason to get married I've ever head," he tells her. "And...and life - specifically our lives - are much more complicated than that, love." He grins at her a little. "But...yeah. A'right. If you're that set on it...this works out with us, then...sure. One day we can get married."

[enduring_pryde]

"Okay. I'll take that." For now. But married before she was forty for sure. "What do you think of us having kids? I mean, at least you're getting acclimated to them from Maggie Braddock. And I'm pretty sure any of ours wouldn't advance so quickly, neither of us being a magical being, but just a pair of Mutants." Which meant a good chance of having a child that would have the X-gene, but it rarely expressed itself before puberty.

[goawayleavemealone]

It's hardly the mutant thing he's worried about with having children.

Sure it's a concern, but it's not-

"I never really thought about bein' a dad," he admits. "Bringin' more Wisdoms into the world doesn't exactly sound like a very good idea, considering all of the rampant asinine mental illnness runnin' through the family gene pool."

[enduring_pryde]

"Which can be helped with upbringing, therapy, and if necessary medication, so there are ways around that too." She smiles softly. "I'm just thinking, with Brian and Meg having a kid, and you are seeing less of the field now, this gives us an interesting opportunity." Marriage and children had been on her mind for some time. There was a good reason why she ended up being engaged twice.

[goawayleavemealone]

He opens his mouth and then closes it.

A mutant kid is one thing. That's hard enough. A mutant kid who will be in and out of therapy their whole life, on and off medications, adjustment after adjustment, just like Pete's mother went through her whole life, trying to wrangle an unruly, unhealthy and unhelpful mind.

"I need to think about it more," he says quietly.

[enduring_pryde]

She nods. "I understand." She closes her eyes. "I had a very vivid dream. Us, married for twenty years, with an eighteen year old child. And it was one of the most loving things I have ever felt. Who knows if it was real," as vivid future dreams sometimes happened to her for a multitude of reasons, "but it felt real and it felt right. And if it is? We really have nothing to worry about."

[goawayleavemealone]

It sounds...

Perfect.

It sounds perfect, and perfect doesn't happen to him.

He doesn't trust perfect and he doesn't trust fate. Everything can change in an instant. One decision, one choice could change any future forever.

He takes a breath and slides out of bed, headed for the bathroom. "Gonna get ready for work."

[enduring_pryde]

She recognises the look he gives her all to well. She catches his hand to give it a squeeze before he can get himself out of bed. Pete didn't think he was deserving of anything, much less happiness. It was meant for everyone but him.

Well she wasn't going anywhere. When he wasn't over-thinking--a tendency that they both had--things were perfect. And he would begin to see. What changes he had already made to his life spoke of a very competent, caring, and kind man. He was a leader without making a big deal about it, or showing any insecurities about sharing the leadership role with Captain Britain. She thinks a moment to when Scott and Ororo faced each other to lead the X-Men. And Ororo bested him, without any powers. Scott had showed some ugly traits of leadership that day: jealously, short-sidedness, being unable to compromise. And not long after that he walked out on his wife and child to create X-Factor with the original X-Men, including Jean Grey, whom he thought was dead. Toxic masculinity, toxic behaviour, and really a coward. Scott showed that behaviour a lot more times in the years that followed.

Kitty knew she couldn't be married to someone deep within that life. It actually showed signs of a cult in some ways. The leadership had dwindled throughout the years. They had no mandate to follow. In many ways, they had become a self-fulfilling prophecy and the biggest threat to them were themselves.

"One day, you will see just how much good you deserve in your life," she says, not caring if Pete hears her or not.

[goawayleavemealone]

He doesn't hear her, opting for a freezing cold shower to clear his head. He feels a little like he can't breathe with her here, asking these questions no one had ever posed, or hadn't posed in so long it didn't matter.

He doesn't have any answers.

He comes out shortly after, wearing a towel, to get dressed.

"You wanna make coffee here, or you wanna go out for it?" he asks. "We could stop by the Bake shop again if you like." He pulls clean clothes from the closet, looking at his ties for a moment, before pulling out a blue one.

[enduring_pryde]

"Sounds great! Let's go out for it," she says, smiling softly and going to take her own shower.

After her shower she touches up on her nail polish on her fingers and toenails and walks back out, body and hair wrapped in two towels. "I'll be ready in about five minutes." She goes to the guest room and dresses in the clothes she had set out the night before. She comes back dressed in a dark blue blouse, charcoal grey slacks, and black flats. "Oh I like your tie."

[goawayleavemealone]

He nods as he adjusts his tie. "Bake shop it is." He grins at her gratefully. "Suppose you weren't around when I started wearing actual colors."

[enduring_pryde]

"No. That came after my time." She grabs her computers, notes, and purse. "I like that it matches your eyes." Pete's eyes being her favourite trait. They always told her what his mindset really was.

It was making her feel a bit giddy that he was hers again, in some way. And yet they could also take things slow. The need for sex wasn't quite there. She was satisfied by the other acts of physical intimacy. How he kept rubbing her back the night before had felt so nice. She wanted more cuddles and to be held. She was also suspecting that he was feeling as fragile as she did, so taking it slow was of great benefit to them both.